eyes wide open 2

Eyes wide open hating the way you made me feel one of these days you will see the truth. One of these days we will all know the truth of why I am the way I am. Eyes wide open cause I am scared to sleep Never ever again will I fall. No one can save me from my own hell Have to keep going to find the truth in all the lies I have been told. Eyes wide open to the face that everyone has lied to me.Crying harder now than ever before trying to resists the urges running thur my head, Trying to put this damn knife down.Even you cant see my total pain. Eyes wide open to the rawness I do not like. Would rather die than feel this way again.Cant take much more of this pain I feel wanting it to end right now. No more tears no more sorrow no more pain ever again Curse you for making me feel this way Wondering why do I do this to myself wanting answers I never will get Eyes wide open to why I had all those walls up. Feeling shit I never wanted to feel. Hearing shit I never wanted to hear Learning shit I never wanted to learn Eyes wide open to the fact I will never be normal never ever be like everyone else in the world always gonna be alone. Crazy and looney that is me by default hating it but knowing its fact Feeling the cold steel against my skin what a release it can bring. Eyes wide open to how I will die. God only knows what can save me. Wanting to escape this hell called life not wanting to die but dont know what else is there. Dont know if I can wait till Oct to find out the truth wanting to find these answers that will haunt me till I am gone. Always know that I loved you and have never been right minded. Eyes wide open to the fact of death coming soon  Eyes wide open not caring anymore Eyes wide open wanting to run Eyes wide open to all the pain I feel Getting closer everyday to the end