New toy

Update

Mark is home on the list for 5yrs Oh keep the knife got a new one later

Day by day

Trying to take life day by day right now, because its way way to hard to do more than that. My husband has been kicked outta the house in order for our kids to staying living with me. Man four kids are impossible to  deal with by oneself. Again I give props to all single parents out there. At least 3wks till Mark is allowed back in the house when the kids are home. ugh ugh ugh He ready to quit and has said it even a few times, "its not worth it" he says. Yeah that helps me out allot Mark ahhhh I hate you for saying stuff like that.

Ugh

Gonna miss my friends hate to see them leave. But it is for the better so good luck Reed's safe travles

Props

I give props to all single parents out there. I am a singel parent for a couple weeks and it very very hard cause I have four very active kids ugh

Fear

The fear came back last night, like a freight train headed straight towards me. I thought for sure I was gonna get nailed. I got lucky, not sure how. Tired and sore all over all the time ugh.

Honestly

I hate where my life is going. I want to so bad make changes but fear I cant. Not sure how to fix this either. My writtings and dreams keep getting darker and darker.